oh, and...

I haven't uttered a single word out loud in over four hours. It feels weird. It makes me wonder how long it would be before I couldn't talk anymore? My mouth kinda feels glued shut, like it's broken. I probably won't talk anymore tonight I probably won't talk until I get to Starbucks in the morning. I hope it doesn't sound weird. This hasn't really ever happened before...

geez!

I totally forgot I had a blog....except that's a lie. Well, kinda. I forgot about the blog. Bitches be like, "what's up with the blog, yo?", and then I'm like, right! the blog! So, I shall now blog about not blogging and blogs-to-be and, most importantly, I am not a fan of the word blog at all......

As previously stated, I may or may not have forgotten the blog, therefore I didn't do it.

I promise to blog more often so that we don't have to have this talk again. I promise, OK! Promise! It may not be every day, but it'll happen more often than not.

I hate the word blog, the fact it's used as a verb (blogging), and that I am not in some circles, or this circle, referred to as a blogger. I'm going to think of a new word.

but really

i was forced to blog!! had it started for me, and announced to the world!! i felt so calm and in control last night, and now that i can watch whatever i want on tv i'm too flustered by blogging to move on!! somebody get kate a tv stat so she can watch naomi drag race on 90210 and i can go back to my witty status updates!!

f this. i'm going to starbucks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

this is why I blog....

or more appropriately, this is why I will blog...

it's 11:46pm, and I'm wide awake! i think it's a curse from my paternal grandmother who used to sleep until noon, drive down one-way streets, drink tea with bourbon and then switch to bourbon with coke at 5pm, and stay up until 4 in the morning cleaning the screens from her windows, typing letters and speeches, and watching infomercials.... i also have her hands, but that trait doesn't stand out nearly as much as the aforementioned facts. i wish that i hid money around the house so i'd have surprises later....but I digress.

it's 11:5opm now, and it didn't take me long to get completely off track. i'm still wide awake, and still blogging. no one is online to play wordscrapper right now because all my friends and family have things like husbands and children and reasons to get up before 8am. i have chach and hd tivo, and the combination can be dangerous to both your eyes and ears. in the last 45 minutes, since i got home and started my blogger life, he's watched the following shows: "gangland: everybody killers", "my name is earl", "heli loggers", "gefilte diaries", and something about animal cops...as i try to think of six-letter words that end in 't' all i can really think about are lc and heidi, jon and kate, ellen and tony, liz lemon and kenneth, and all my other tv friends who are waiting for me to 'bloop bloop' in and see what entertainment they're waiting to provide to me! how can you mindlessly watch people chop down trees when michael scott just started his own paper company!?!